Sunday, November 27, 2011

The Incident Report

And so it begins. Jeff and I barely survived parenting Mitchell through his teen years at Columbus Academy. Now, we are taking on triplets in round two of kindergarten at a Jewish day school. The dynamics have shifted slightly, with me working full time I feel as if I am missing out on the precious moments. I actually miss hearing the stories and little blurbs during the carpool drive home.

Jeff gets the benefit of this special time now. While I am pretty sure he plugs into his i-pod and tunes the kids out, I doubt he realizes the gems that come from their mouths during drive time. Perhaps, if I was still doing the transporting, I could have prevented the latest communication from the kindergarten teacher. Maybe I would have anticipated the direction things were going?

When the communication is written as a formal incident report, you know the matter has escalated from a poor judgement call from a 6 year old, to a disciplinary situation. This is exactly what happened last week with Eli.

Here are the highlights from the e-mail I received from the teacher:

Dear families,
I wanted to let you know about an incident that occured at recess this afternoon. The first grade teacher on duty brought this issue to our attention. Eli and Rachel were seen hiding behind a tree and kissing. We ask that you please discuss this incident with your child and let them know that we need to keep kissing only for at home. We are currently battling many illnesses here at school, and I have instructed the class several times before about the spread of germs and how kissing should only be for our families at home, not our friends at school. Hopefully this will be enough to encourage them to not repeat this action again in the future. Thank you for your support!

O.M.G. I was stunned. I knew that Eli had a kindergarten crush on Rachel. He talks endlessly about her, he draws her picture all the time, and he calls Rachel his girlfriend, but I honestly thought it was all innocent and sweet. Apparently, Eli is in advanced kindergarten where you can hide behind a tree and smooch your girl. Oy vey. Perhaps if I was still doing the pick up after school I could have seen this coming and done something to prevent the whole scenario. I have some serious Mommie guilt all right.

As much as I giggled a little bit, I was worried that Rachel's parents would be pissed off. This is an Orthodox school for crissakes. (pun) I mean when Aaryn dated Ephraim, they did not even hold hands, there was no touching at all until marriage. Holy crap, this was like a major league offense to the religious Jewish folks.

I figured Rachel's mom and dad would either have a sense of humor, or we would be going to Jared. Thankfully, I noticed that Rachel's mom was making light of the situation in the form of a status update on Facebook. She wrote: "Just got an email from the kindergarten teacher letting me know that Rachel was kissing a boy at recess on the mouth. Fantastic." So I chimed in. And we were good.

Then, I posted a similar status on my facebook and almost all the comments compared Eli to little Mitchell, which brought the whole subject full circle. Anyone who knew Mitchell in kindergarten had to put their two cents in, and join the conversation. The apple doesn't fall from the tree I am afraid. Oh my hell how I fear my future.

Jeff and I had a discussion with Eli. We talked about appropriate behavior at school and we made sure he understood that kissing is okay when you are older. For now, he needs to focus on playing at recess, not kissing at recess.

I am sure this is the first of many incident reports to come our way. I am glad that the first one made me giggle out loud. I only hope I am laughing in the future. If anybody is going to Jared it is going to be my husband, not my SON!


Leslie said...

When a little girl in my daughter's kindergarten class was trying to kiss the boys, the teacher told them they all needed to please "keep their mouths to themselves." I am still laughing about that wording.


The Father said...

I just hope we don't have to give the kids condoms for Chanukah.

Sharon said...

Just wondering how things are going.. miss your posts!

Helene Eichenwald Slutsky said...

Sharon, I miss blogging. I miss the kids more so until our new aupair arrives 2/4 I'm totally gonna get caught up. I swear. Trust me, it's not for a lack of material.

The older crowd

The older crowd
Amanda and Mitchell

A blast from the past...makes it all so real now