Thursday, June 3, 2010

The Peanut Gallery

All things considered, the comments from the general public are getting better. Sometimes, I still get the parenting drive-bys where I am blindsided by ignorance and stupidity, but overall, it is easier to go out without listening to or being engaged in meaningless conversation with morons.

So, after four and a half years of displaying my freak show, I am more comfortable than ever taking the kids out and about. We go somewhere and do something every single day.

Do I miss the non stop chaos that infant triplets cause? NO! I do not. Do I miss the endless questions about my fertility? No, No way. I still get my fair share of nice remarks too, and they seem to outweigh the negative these days.

Some days, like today, it just rains and pours with dumb comments from the peanut gallery.

This morning, I took the boys to get haircuts. As we waited our turn, the kids played so nicely together in the little area of toys. I admit, they were enjoying themselves and that means they were not silent. Okay, it means there was endless laughter, some whining, some fighting, some bickering and the sound of toys being clanked and tinkered. It was far from quiet, but for the most part, they were happy sounds. The kids were not doing anything inappropriate. When I redirected them during the moments of not sharing, they quickly resolved the problem.

Some a-hole, waiting for a haircut had the nerve to say. "Are they all yours?" When I smiled and said yes, he continued. "They sure are a noisy bunch, do you ever want to kill yourself?" I was so pissed-- I could feel my heart rate start to increase. How dare he say that in front of the children. How awful. I used my fakest, sweetest, voice with eye contact that said, don't eff with me, and replied, "Oh gosh, no- I am so lucky to have such well behaved children, they are all little angels. Thanks for noticing how perfect they are!" He was fit to be tied, arms crossed, stern look on his face, and he shook his head in disbelief. I shot him a few daggers from my eyes as we continued to wait.

As a reward for doing a good job at the barber shop, I took the "little angels" to Pistacia Vera. This is a real treat for them, and they earned it. They were so excited at the thought of getting their own cookie, they posed for a few photos
outside the bakery. CJ can have the gluten free French Macaroon sandwich cookies and he meticulously selects the one he wants from the glass case.

The whole process of choosing and getting their own individual item is the highlight of the experience.

As we walked back to the van, a woman with a young girl approached us. She asked me, "WOW, do you always dress them like Mrs. Beasley?" I just said, "No, not always, just today." Seriously, I thought their outfits were adorable, and it never crossed my mind that they resembled the doll from Family Affair.While this wasn't necessarily a negative comment, it did bother me. Holy crap, now I can't get the image of that doll out of my head. I wonder what ever happened to my Mrs. Beasley? I am sure she was sold at a garage sale in the 80's, to help diffuse the cost of my Jordache jeans. In case you are in possession of a mint condition Mrs. Beasley, they are going for more than fifty bucks on eBay nowadays.

To diffuse the Mrs. Beasley situation, I channeled my energy to thinking about the blog. It was a nice mental diversion. I took this photo of my boyas he devoured the cookie. As I was taking photos he urged me to make short little video- he said, make a movie for your blog Mom. How could I resist?
When CJ eats something "scrumptious" his expressions are just heartwarming. You can just tell how much he is loving his macaroon. And the demand for another cookie at the end of the movie is none other than, Natalie!

Since today was the day for oddball remarks, I tried to steer clear of anyone who looked my direction. I was avoiding eye contact to prevent another drive by comment.

While filling the van with gas, a woman who pulled in behind me, and got out of her car. She noticed the triplets plus one decal (which in all fairness asks for trouble) and said, "You mean you had triplets, then had another?" I nodded. She said, "You know, they have ways you can prevent that kind of problem." I wanted to go apeshit postal on her, but instead, I just smiled and used that nauseating voice, "There is no problem- we are expecting twins in 6 months (rubbing my belly) and all babies are a gift from G-d." I wanted to puke in my own mouth but instead I just giggled and got the last laugh. I am sure she went home and told all her nosey nelly friends that she saw some Michelle Duggar wannabe. OY!

My sense of humor is all I had left after all three idiot episodes.

I am so grateful for my children that it really saddens me when the peanut gallery rains on my parade. I have humor as a defense mechanism and fortunately, the good comments outweigh the bad.

If you can't say something nice, start a blog.

3 comments:

Alice said...

Their outfits are adorable.

People really are idiots.

I had to take my three to Wal-mart a few weeks ago. I rarely go there let alone with the kids. I had them in two carts and was quite efficiently pushing one and pulling the other when some asshole decided to play chicken with his cart. Seriously, at Wal-mart people will not move, stop, even inch over to accomadate others. I kept going until I realized he had no intention of stopping. So I jerk stopped two carts and moved over then as I regained momentum, he asks smartly "did you bring the whole neighborhood"? I quite bitchilly replied "Yes, the whole neighborhood" and then muttered dumbass under my breath.

My triplets are 3 1/2 now and there are days when I undoubtedly look 4-5 months pregnant. So I am sure there has been much speculation about me being pregnant again in our tiny little community. Someday there will be a tummy tuck but in the meantime I quess I will give them something to talk about!

Nothing shocks me anymore... said...

I have not really dealt with much since the twins left the stroller. Even then people did not catch they were twins, they thought they were just really close together. Today I had a sample of what you *other* moms taste. I dressed all 3 in cordinating outfits from Childrens Place for portraits. I have never had so many people, stop us, stare, ask questions etc. Everyone was very nice but I was laughing b/c I just read this blog. I never got that much attn except when they were in infant carriers and I had the two and a toddler! Keep strong mama!

Sabrina said...

I get these kind of comments from my own family. It's disgusting really, I mean are you asking these people to support your children!? NO! So, WHY do they feel inclined to share their crappy opinion?? I tell them to shove it, and that includes my Mother. I have always wanted 4 children. After we had #2 (At this point a boy and a girl) everyone kept saying "we assume you are done" - Why? We support them, we don't ask for help or take government money, what do they care? Well...I'm expecting #4 now, and they haven't been informed.

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