Saturday, June 27, 2009

Garage Sale Fiasco- We are NEGATIVE $310.00

We got up at 6:15 a.m and put our sale together right on time. We were ready for the early birds and I predicted the traffic would start well before the designated 8:00- and I was right. It was garage sale-a-palooza!

The weather was a perfect sunny, clear 80 degrees and our garage sale was on track to earn us the big bucks.

I had a rolling rack with the brand new Ohio State University Pleather Jackets that I bought in KC for $3.33 each, various maternity clothes and a few of the Michigan Jackets to counter balance the OSU gear. There was something for everyone at the Slutsky Sale.

There was no need to add balloons to our mailbox or even place a sign because I had the two firetruck toddler beds across the lawn to attract buyers. Nothing stops an array of garage salers like toddler beds with flashing lights on top. (Jeff was so please with me for selling these for $44 more than I paid for them two years ago)

After the first hour I was ready to put up a large sign that said:
No tools
No Fishing Gear
No Golf Stuff
No Camping equipment
No Jewelry
NO BATHROOM AVAILABLE. Seriously, who asks a random stranger to go inside their home (while they are outside) to use the facilities? Between 8 and 11 I had four different folks ask me. Our friend Judy stopped by and I let her go for 50 cents, but I know her.

Garage Salers are funny people. One lady bought $2 worth of misc. crap and only had $1.20 in her wallet (so she said) so I told her that I would just make it her lucky day and accept the buck-twenty. Fine. Good. The bitch got pissed off when I did not have a bag to give her for the stuff. C'mon woman this is a garage sale not Nordstrom.

I had an entire rack of the red and black OSU jackets when the sale started. There were all sizes at that time. Around noon a woman came back and wanted to buy a size Large. We had XXL and XXXL left. She had the audacity to say, "Well, when I was here at 9:00 you had a Large. True, True, we had a large but you did not buy it someone else did. Honestly, did she think we were going to just keep replenishing sizes like they do at Wal Mart? I was completely in awe and I wanted to say, "You snooze you lose!" but instead I just told her "Sorry".

My across the street neighbors were selling this wooden toy organizerwith all the buckets for ten bucks, so I got it. We will use this in the laundry room as a storage shelf to house the kids' socks, underwear and pajamas. It is perfect and for ten dollars cash I will be happy to fill it with clean clothes and skip going upstairs for the night time items.

At one point I noticed that I cut my legand was bleeding all over the place. This is the kind of glamour and glory you get from hosting a garage sale.

Slowly but surely we sold almost everything. At noon we were left with a few odds and ends and called it quits. We earned almost $800 from the sale of merchandise.
I did not have enough hours to weed through the rest of our old stuff or perhaps we could have made closer to my $2100 figure, but I was really, really, happy with $800.

When we finally came inside to re-hydrate and relax we learned that during our sale Eli escaped from the playroom, went into the basement, found an open bottle of Mitchell's grape flavored powerade, drank a few sips, and then poured the remainder of the 32 ounce bottle all over Amanda's laptop computer. Jeff and Argenida were tag teaming the kids while I was outside turning away people looking for items that Jewish people never own, and somehow with two sets of eyes on the kids, it happened.

The laptop was purchased last year for about $1100. Welcome to HELL. We have the laptop turned upside downon the kitchen table hoping the liquid drains out and it will reboot without issues. Yeah Right. Next year when the Home Owners Association schedules the garage sale, I will be sure to be out of town. I simply can't afford to participate.

The garage sale fiasco boils down to this:

Sales from Garage Sale Merchandise..... $800
Purchases from Neighbors.................$10
Cost to replace Amanda's Laptop........$1100

Final Fiasco Total, - $310.00

How much do you think I can get when I sell Eli to the highest bidder?


Anonymous said...

I couldn't make it there today, but will be there tomorrow at 6 a.m. Looks like some great deals!

Michele S said...

Dude. You can't have a garage sale without tools or fishing gear. Are you telling me Jews don't use tools? Jesus was a carpenter!!!! LOLOLOLOLOLOL!

Of course, Greg roams around on garbage day and picks up "bait" for our garage sales. Used wheelbarrows, old rakes and shit.

Did you have any shoplifters? Those are my personal favorite.

Man, that really sucks about the laptop. I would be crying. Seriously.

Helene Eichenwald Slutsky said...

Michele- we did not have any shoplifters that I noticed but two guys tried to scam me with shitty adding skills, and when it comes to adding my money, I can count, so I promptly re totaled their purchases and made sure they knew I was not fooled.

Jesus may have been a carpenter, but with my unhandy husband the only tool he knows how to use is attached as his man bits0 wink wink.

ree said...

Can I use your bathroom??? For real??? Did they also ask for the alarm code or combination for the safe? C'mon, that's gutsy!

And, too funny. I am truly sorry for the laptop, but thank you for the giggle! I needed that today!

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