For those of you who guessed rings or jewels, So So WRONG! No, not my husband. Not the current hurry up and save for college mode. Not in this economy. No way. Not unless I would be happy with costume jewelry or diamonique from QVC and even then I seriously doubt Jeff would or could pull the trigger and select something without my guidance and suggestion. Nice thought though- and actually, while I should not admit it, I have plenty of blings. There I said it, and have publicly outed myself as being jewelry complete. Ahem, For Now. I am not totally insane- I know this is just temporary. C'mon- gimme some credit. Never say never. Clearly, if Harry Winston showed up at my front door (he would probably run after reading the sign on the doorbell) I would not turn him away.
Anywho...back to the birthday gift! The kids helped Jeff select the perfect fit, for my van...a set of 3 brand new Michelin Tires. I had a flat a while back but only replaced the one tire, so with 49K miles on my super sexy Sienna, it was high time to indulge in the luxury known as "new rubber." Jeff whispered those incredible sweet nothings into my ear- he lovingly said, "Darling, Happy Birthday, you deserve nothing but the very best now that you are forty,(cue the heavy breathing) ohhhh ahhhh oooh, P-225-60-R 17's filled with Nitrogen, rotated & balanced especially for you!" If you think a man doing dishes, or folding laundry is a total turn-on, you can only imagine how completely jazzed I was to get 3 new state of the art Michelins for my birthday. Trust me, if you are anywhere near 40, have a shit-load of expensive kids, and are in a constant and annoying state of non-spending- getting 3 tires is like winning the friggin lottery. Woooo hooo! Giddeeee up!
We took the kids with us to get the new tires at Costco. When you are three years old, watching car repairs is better than NOGGIN- it is live entertainment.
The trio sat on the bench and peered through the glass window while the van was hoisted up, had tires removed and was being "fixed" up again. Of course they drilled us with questions about each tool, and piece of machinery- Why? What is that? Why? How come? Why? What for? Why? Ughhhh, after a few too many rounds of that dialogue I was ready to start a blog called TIRES 101- how to lose your mind while waiting for tire installation with 4 kids 3 and under! Thankfully I gave up on homeschooling them otherwise based on all our recent field trips to the grocery store and tire center, and Argenida's tutoring they would be well versed on auto-shop, home ec and Spanish but failing English, algebra and chemistry.
After about 10 minutes of staring through glass and inquiring about every blasted thing in the service bay they got antsy and decided it would be even more spectacular to play in the stacks of tires in the department. Ordinarily I would have made them sit and behave but this was my birthday "party" and I did not micro-manage the fun-
they played hide and go seek in the stacked new tires, climbed all over the place and were in auto shop heaven. I figured it was a fairly safe place for them to monkey around. My big fear is that every time we go back to Costco (weekly??) they will assume it is like indoor Disneyland in the tire department. Note to self: Next time they play in stacks of tires, have them wear grungy clothes and bring Febreeze to de-rubberize them before putting them in a heated van with the windows rolled up. YUCK- they all smelled like a Trojan covered frat house on a Friday night- not that I would have personal knowledge of that, of course!
So here is the MEGA glam picture of moi- with my fancy new tires. It is so incredibly HOT to be 40 with new Michelins, right? If you are more interested in the actual tires, which most men probably are since I am not topless or Halle Berry.
After watching the REAL HOUSEWIVES of ORANGE COUNTY I have decided to star in my own reality series, the REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW ALBANY where Martinis, Manolos and Michelins Rule. Happy Birthday To Me!
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